BEYOND FACT AND FICTION #19: MAKING SUPERHERO SLOGANS by Eric Barrett

[Blake Petit]

Beyond Fact and Fiction – Issue 19

By Eric Barrett

Designing superhero slogans


Slogans are part of American culture. We see them everywhere, from “drink Coke” to “Just do it” to “McDonald’s: making American’s fat one bite at a time”. Slogans are most commonly associated with advertising and marketing (known as “getting you to buy crap you don’t need” in professional circles). But they’ve also been used at momentous occasions, to encourage others and to show what you stand for.

In fact, slogans have really been used since the beginning of human existence. The very earliest slogan discovered was on a cave wall that had been buried under glaciers for millennia. The slogan reads, “getting cold outside”. Clearly the people at this time were not the brightest Neanderthals in the cave. This can be demonstrated by two facts. 1. The caveman was perfectly preserved in a chunk of ice next to the wall. 2. He clearly should have been wearing a coat. So perhaps this is an example of a slogan that just wasn’t effective.

However, that won’t stop us here at Beyond Fact & Fiction – really does anything ever stop us?

<a href="http://www.comixtreme.com/gallery/data/media/747/MacArthur.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.comixtreme.com/gallery/data/thumbnails/747/MacArthur.jpg" align="right" border="0"></a>Slogans have also been used by military leaders, politicians, and men named “Stu”. To put it simply, slogans have been a staple of civilization. Right up there with Jiffy Pop. Perhaps the best-known slogan was General Douglas A. MacArthur declaring, “I shall return.” Of course anytime you show up without your pants, you’d be tempted to say something too. Fortunately for the US Army, he managed to find some pants, and we proceeded to win World War 2.

But clearly this served as a motivational point for our soldiers – who from that day forward also wore pants.

If slogans have worked for all those other people (and Stu), I don’t see why superheroes can’t use the same method. Fortunately, through my ingenious network of microphones, and use of artistic license, I have managed to pick up quite a few superhero battle cries. Using this data I’ve done some exhaustive research during the last hour, and I am now ready to present the three keys to a successful superhero slogan.

1. Motivation: A good slogan needs to motivate the hero and those around him/her.

<a href="http://www.comixtreme.com/gallery/data/media/26/amazingspidey514.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.comixtreme.com/gallery/data/thumbnails/26/amazingspidey514.jpg" align="left" border="0"></a>We’ve all heard Spider-Man use the “with great power comes great responsibility” line, but what most people don’t know is that his other lesser-known slogan is “Don’t tread on me – I’m not really a bug”.

And right before the Thing slugs someone he often mutters “Tastes great, less filling”. Most people don’t realize those knuckle sandwiches fit the South Beach Diet.

Now if you look closely at these lines – you may need to squint – you’ll see a subtle difference. And when you see that difference, please let me know what it is.

In the meantime, while Spider-Man may have better slogans, they aren’t very motivational to others. Who wants to take on more responsibility? Whereas the Thing’s slogan, while also not motivational, is kind of catchy. And you’ll notice that Spider-Man is hunted by the police and Daily Bugle, while Thing is a renowned citizen and a prestigious member of the Fantastic Four.

Clearly the only explanation can be in their respective slogans.

2. Solidify Identity: Slogans should help others understand you.

<a href="http://www.comixtreme.com/gallery/data/media/20/PlasticMan16.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.comixtreme.com/gallery/data/thumbnails/20/PlasticMan16.jpg" align="left" border="0"></a>A lot of second tier heroes – you know, the ones that either have stupid powers, or are not named Wolverine - have moved to new battle cries. And for good reason. It’s clear that Plastic Man would get a lot more media coverage if he simply said, “Plastic Man, now with 30% more crime fighting ability.”

Now while I admit, that Batman has one of the coolest nicknames (“That bat guy”), I think we all agree even he could use a slogan to help him fight crime more efficiently. So I’d like to Batman start saying, “now removes that tough, caked on, crime.”

These slogans are not only catchy, they also help identify the heroes purpose for existing. No one wants a hero that isn’t useful. For instance, Gambit’s “chere” slogan isn’t very effective in branding himself. No one wants to hear about a washed up singer. Is it any wonder no one likes Gambit?

3. Reflect Personality: Slogans should match an individual’s personality.

There’s nothing worse than a slogan that doesn’t fit – except perhaps having to watch re-runs of Scarecrow and Mrs. King. Heroes that aren’t using slogans that match their personality are just asking for trouble. For instance, Cookie Monster has recently changed his slogan to “Cookies are a sometimes food.” By doing so he’s defeated his purpose of existing. No one wants to see a Cookie Monster that’s a health nut.

<a href="http://www.comixtreme.com/gallery/data/media/436/archpun.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.comixtreme.com/gallery/data/thumbnails/436/archpun.jpg" align="right" border="0"></a>The same goes for the Punisher. When he briefly tried the line “violence is a sometimes activity” during the 80’s people just didn’t take him seriously.

The bottom line is you need a slogan that matches your personality.

There you have it, the three immutable laws of coming up with a Superhero slogan. So remember the next time you’re preparing to fight the forces of evil, don’t forget to take a deep breath and yell, “may cause hair loss!”


This column was fun to write because I got to come up with a bunch of slogans. And we all know, “slogans are fun” (say it with me now, “slogans are fun”). I recommend trying to come up with your own superhero slogans, now that you know the three keys to success. And remember, knowing is half the work…or something.

[silvermeteu]

Back in high school, when my American History teacher would kick me out of class, I'd get up and say "in the words of General Douglas A. MacArthur: 'I shall return'".

Great column. Very funny.

[Eric Barrett]

Thank you silvermeteu glad you liked it!

I imagine your history teacher wasn't too thrilled with your MacArthur quote. I suppose it's better than returning to class saying, "one small step for students, one giant step closer to detention."

[Ronée]

ahhhhh who can forget The Scarecrow and Mrs. King? good times.

[Blake Petit]

Dude, you left off the Thing's real slogan, the best darn slogan in comics. "IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME!!!"

[Eric Barrett]

Scarecrow and Mrs. King was one of those shows that we used to watch as a family with some good popcorn. I haven't seen it in years, but I suspect it's really much worse than I thought it was when I was only 9.

As for the Thing's slogan, I agree it's a good one - because it actually fits my 3 rules. But I only use Gambit's and Spider-Man's real slogans in the article...so Thing shouldn't feel too bad.

--> "Nope not too bad at all. In fact, I enjoy the plugs in darkhawk's column."

See there you have it, a direct quote from the man himself.

[Andrea Speed]

Well, I've ripped off - I mean, borrowed - all my slogans from The Tick: Spoon! Gravity is a harsh mistress! Don't count your weasels before they pop, dink! OK, nostril-spawn! Evildoers, eat my justice! Let the probing begin! It's time to deploy the middle child!

(Now, you know I couldn't pass up another pointless tick reference - come on! Besides, he had some of the best catch phrases.)

[Eric Barrett]

Andrea, am I going to have to rename this column "Beyond Tick and Fiction"?

I totally agree with you about Tick quotes. He has/had some of the best one-liners in history. And in the live action show, the way the Tick delivered them made them all the better.

I do think my favorite was probably "Gravity is a harsh mistress!"