EVERYTHING BUT IMAGINARY #190: THE WRONG LESSON FROM SPIDER-GIRL

[Blake Petit]

I’ve always had sort of an on-again, off-again relationship with Marvel Comics’ Spider-Girl. When I first heard about the character, I expected her to be a cheesy Spider-Man knock-off, and wearing a costume that still left a bad taste in my mouth at that. I was surprised, then, when the book started to generate such critical buzz. Finally, I tried an issue and, to my surprise, I liked it.

Over the next few years, I would read an issue here or there, finally becoming a regular reader for a while, then dropping the book for a while, then coming back. The quality went up and down and up again, but even when I wasn’t reading, I was glad the book was there. Comics needed titles like this – mostly lighthearted, fun, utterly-self contained and starring a fairly realistic teenage heroine (emotionally, if not anatomically). I was one of the voices shouting to keep Mayday Parker alive when she was threatened with cancellation again and again, and when Marvel seemed to give her a vote of confidance with their Amazing Spider-Girl relaunch, I was pleased as punch.

I was never angry at the book, not for any reason. Not until Amazing Spider-Girl #2.

(Consider this a very minor spoiler warning, if you haven’t read the issue.)

In this issue Mayday, coming back from investigating some bit of supervillain nastiness or another, is caught by a teacher wandering the halls of her high school without a pass. Assuming she’s skipping class (a reasonable assumption), she’s given detention. While she’s there, her parents try calling her cell phone. The second time it rings, when her mother is calling, the teacher answers the phone, announces that she’s serving her time in detention, and hangs up.

This next bit is the part that really frosts my behind.

Mary Jane’s reaction to this is to march into school and demand her daughter be released from detention, a perfectly legitimate detention, I should add. Then, as if that wasn’t enough, she tells the teacher that if he ever answers May’s cell phone again, she’ll sue him.



Give me a freaking break.

Even worse, it was written so as to be a big “heroic” moment for M.J., like she’d just taken a dramatic stand against injustice or something.This may not have bothered me so much a year or two ago, but things have changed for me. I am a teacher now, and the behavior M.J. displayed in this issue is exactly the sort of thing that makes our lives harder every day.

There are a lot of things wrong with schools today. Some of them are inflicted by bad schoolboard policies, some by bad administration policies and, yes, sometimes it’s a problem with the teacher. But there is a huge problem, one I have witnessed firsthand, with students who behave abominably because their parents let them get away with it. A child is punished for disrupting class and their parent insists they be allowed to “express themselves.” Students who fight have their behavior written off as having “troubles at home.” Kids who don’t pay attention and get bad grades as a result? The teacher isn’t “engaging them properly.” Gag me with a steam shovel. How on Earth is any teacher supposed to maintain discipline in class if the student never has to face any consequences for their behavior at home?

Let’s look at this objectively. A teacher finds a student roaming the hall without a pass. Granted, she had a good reason, but the teacher didn’t know this, and Mayday offered no explanation. In that circumstance, giving her detention (assuming that’s the school’s policy) is absolutely the right thing to do.

Then there’s the cell phone thing. I don’t know of a single school where students are allowed to take calls in class, let alone detention. At my school, if a phone rings in class it gets confiscated, and the student’s parent has to come to school to get it back. And while answering the phone may have been an extreme reaction for the teacher, the last time I checked, there sure as Hell wasn’t a law against it. No doubt whatever snake oil reeking lawyer she dug up would try to claim some sort of violation of May’s “civil liberties,” which is a term that used to have meaning but these days is simply a catch phrase to excuse any manner of idiotic behavior.

On the other side, let’s look at Mary Jane. Her goal was to get her daughter out, and for good reason: there was someone in trouble, someone who needed Spider-Girl, and that wasn’t going to happen if M.J. didn’t spring her daughter. But does that mean the best way to handle it is to storm in, undermine the teacher and strongarm May out? How about a family emergency? How about whipping up a reason May has to get out of class instead of barging in like Scarface reaching for his little frien’? She’s been married to Spider-Man for decades here, she’s got experience with the creative lie. Now she’s marked herself to the school faculty as uncooperative and her daughter is doing to get the brand of a child who thinks she can get away with things. She’s made things worse all around.

Mary Jane’s reaction, to put it bluntly, wasn’t just out of line. It was outright stupid.

I’m probably making more of this than I should. It’s a short sequence in an otherwise entertaining comic book, something most people probably won’t give a second thought to. But to me, this is infuriating. I’m teaching The Odyssey to my class right now, and one of the more important points I’m trying to get across is that, to the ancient Greeks, the stories we call Mythology are what they used to teach morality and virtues. The American superhero is often called – and justly so – our mythology. So what lesson does this teach us? That having good intentions makes it okay to browbeat and threaten (irrationally threaten) someone who is also doing the right thing?

I can tell you that the kids in my high school with parents who behave the way Mary Jane did are only learning one thing: that they don’t need to be held accountable for their actions, that Mommy and Daddy will bail them out. Is that what May learned here? No, she’s a smarter, better character than that. But it doesn’t make it okay.

These are the sort of things that prevent kids from ever developing a sense of responsibility.

And for the daughter of Spider-Man to ignore responsibility? That just doesn’t fly.

Favorite of the Week: November 8, 2006

Speaking of comics that are just plain fun, the comics that Chris Eliopoulos and Marc Sumerak these days are pure joy. Their newest special, Franklin Richards: Happy Franksgiving, continues their series of strips starring the child of the Fantastic Four’s Reed and Sue Richards, but cast the way a real kid would behave if their dad left time machines lying around. The holiday connection is tenuous, as only one of the stories herein has anything to do with Thanksgiving, but the story is hysterical anyway, so that’s an easy thing to forgive.

Blake M. Petit is the author of the superhero comedy novel, Other People's Heroes, the suspense novel The Beginner and the weekly “Think About It” humor column at Think About It Central. His new comic, Evertime, is coming soon from Tightlip Entertainment. E-mail him at Blake@comixtreme.com and visit him on the web at Evertime Realms.

[roman]

I have to disagree with this. I'm all for getting more control on these kids but in this case the teacher was out of line. One they should never answer another person's cell phone after taking it away from them. Thats something that to me is just wrong. Even if I would let that slide you check to see who they are talking to. I know Parents who check on their kids by calling their cells. If the teacher is going to have the nerve to grab the cell and answer it then they should at least check who is on the phone.

It just reminds me how stupid the school system could be. I remember being in the principal's office on 9/11 and I pulled out my cell phone to call my mom to check to see if she was ok..if she was still alive and they had the nerve to tell me I shouldn't have my cell phone on me in school.

[Blake Petit]

Originally Posted by roman

It just reminds me how stupid the school system could be. I remember being in the principal's office on 9/11 and I pulled out my cell phone to call my mom to check to see if she was ok..if she was still alive and they had the nerve to tell me I shouldn't have my cell phone on me in school.

An extreme example to be sure, and in that case I would let it slide... but fact is, dude, you shouldn't have it on you in school. Most schools have a rule against it, and it's a rule for a reason.

[Jason Kanno]

Kids, turn off your cell phones when you come to school. Or put 'em on vibrate. Whatever, but I'm with Blake here. It seems more like a cheesy "MJ is a hero" moment than genuine character behavior.

[Blake Petit]

Indeed.

And there are plenty of genuine ways to give MJ a "hero" moment. This was totally unnecessary.

[roman]

Right and I'm not disagreeing but in both cases (mine and in the comic) they could of handled it differently. So for MJ to come in and put her foot down to seems right. As a teacher you have to be able to follow the rules yet use your judgement. Also most school rules are you shouldn't have cell phones ON in school. Esp. when parents give their kids cell phones so they can get in contact in case of emergency's. To tell a student that they can't have a cell phone on them in case of emergency's is like asking for a parent to come down and have a hissy fit.

[Mark Blicharz]

Originally Posted by roman

I have to disagree with this. I'm all for getting more control on these kids but in this case the teacher was out of line. One they should never answer another person's cell phone after taking it away from them. Thats something that to me is just wrong. Even if I would let that slide you check to see who they are talking to. I know Parents who check on their kids by calling their cells. If the teacher is going to have the nerve to grab the cell and answer it then they should at least check who is on the phone.

It just reminds me how stupid the school system could be. I remember being in the principal's office on 9/11 and I pulled out my cell phone to call my mom to check to see if she was ok..if she was still alive and they had the nerve to tell me I shouldn't have my cell phone on me in school.

The teacher probably shouldn't have grabbed the phone, but that phone in every school I've seen is against the rules and the teacher could have confiscated it and Mary Jane would have had to come and get it. If your parent is calling to check at you in school, there are other issues that need to be addressed like what you did that your parent doesn't trust you.

[Blake Petit]

In a perfect world, telling students not to have the phones on would be a good enough rule. The problem is, most of them don't bother obeying that rule, necessitating the other one.

Just a few of the reasons that allowing a phone in school at all is a problem:

• Ringing disrupting class and lessons
• Text messaging feature making it easier to cheat during a test
• Camera phones being misused in restrooms, locker rooms, etc.
• The use of phones to spread inappropriate material (an art teacher at my school found a kid showing around naked pictures of his underage girlfriend a few weeks ago)
• General distractions

If kids could be trusted not to do stuff like this, there'd be no problem letting them hold on to the phones as long as they're off. But too many kids can't be trusted. This is a case where the good suffer for the bad.

As for parents not being able to contact their kid in an emergency: first of all, if the kid is obeying the rules and the phone is off, they can't contact them anyway. Second, parents managed to get a hold of kids in school for a long, loooooooooong time before cell phones were invented. It's quite a simple procedure: call the front office, have someone get this kid out of class.

[roman]

It was detention so there for after school. So in that case its a little different. The situation calls for better handling on the teacher's part. I'm not saying taking the phone away wasn't the right thing to do. But answering it and hanging up. Yeah thats a no. I'm not defending kids. Trust me I've worked at a movie theater. I know how annoying cell phones are and I really really know how disrespectful these new generation of kids can be. Sure May should of told the teacher that her mom was calling but may is a teenager...they make ton of mistakes. The teacher is a adult and should of handling things better.

[Mark Blicharz]

Originally Posted by Blake Petit

In a perfect world, telling students not to have the phones on would be a good enough rule. The problem is, most of them don't bother obeying that rule, necessitating the other one.

Just a few of the reasons that allowing a phone in school at all is a problem:

• Ringing disrupting class and lessons
• Text messaging feature making it easier to cheat during a test
• Camera phones being misused in restrooms, locker rooms, etc.
• The use of phones to spread inappropriate material (an art teacher at my school found a kid showing around naked pictures of his underage girlfriend a few weeks ago)
• General distractions

If kids could be trusted not to do stuff like this, there'd be no problem letting them hold on to the phones as long as they're off. But too many kids can't be trusted. This is a case where the good suffer for the bad.

As for parents not being able to contact their kid in an emergency: first of all, if the kid is obeying the rules and the phone is off, they can't contact them anyway. Second, parents managed to get a hold of kids in school for a long, loooooooooong time before cell phones were invented. It's quite a simple procedure: call the front office, have someone get this kid out of class.

If it's that big of an emergency, you can pick up the kid on the way there. Cell phones should not be in schools ever. What the hell does a 13 year old kid need with a phone anyway? What's so pressing that he/she needs that phone on them 24/7? They have phones in the office you can use if it's absolutely needed.

[Blake Petit]

Let's run over the scene again.

May is in detention. Her father calls. The phone rings and the teacher, reminding her phones are not allowed in detention, confiscates it.

A few minutes later, the phone rings again. This time the teacher answers it and says, "I am afraid Miss Parker is currently in detention and will not be taking calls for the next forty-seven minutes."

The only thing he did wrong, in my estimation, was not turn the phone off himself after he took it. And NONE of that excuses MJ.

[roman]

I don't know my parents like my sister to have one in case of anything and that means anything. Most parents I know want to be able to get in contact with thier children in as many was as possible. Its kinda crazy but parents do like to have ways to check up on their kids. Plus you never know whats going to happen. Life is unpredictable. Again I'm not saying its ok to have them on and in use in school but again I bring it back to the situation in which the teacher was clearly in the wrong.

[Blake Petit]

Originally Posted by roman

the situation in which the teacher was clearly in the wrong.

How? By confiscating the phone? By answering it? The first one is absolutely within his rights. The second one -- you can make a case, but it's a judgment call.

And again, neither of those even remotely justifies MJ threatening a lawsuit.

[Mark Blicharz]

Originally Posted by roman

It was detention so there for after school. So in that case its a little different. The situation calls for better handling on the teacher's part. I'm not saying taking the phone away wasn't the right thing to do. But answering it and hanging up. Yeah thats a no. I'm not defending kids. Trust me I've worked at a movie theater. I know how annoying cell phones are and I really really know how disrespectful these new generation of kids can be. Sure May should of told the teacher that her mom was calling but may is a teenager...they make ton of mistakes. The teacher is a adult and should of handling things better.

Detention is still school. They still have to obey those rules as long as they are on the school's property. Detention is supposed to be punishment, if they are allowed to do what they want on the phone in detention, then where is the punishment? In my high school, suspensions were in school. Kids were getting suspended to get a few day vacation, so the district said no more. The kids that got suspended were charged unexcused absences and were made to sit in the office and study. If they didn't show, they were still charged the unexcused absence and the suspension had a day added on. Nine unexcused absences meant you failed your classes and had to retake the entire semester.

[roman]

Again the teacher should not of answer it and even if the teacher did one the caller id should display who is calling and i don't know if it says Mom or Dad then I would of let them know whats going on. Or asked who is calling. If your going to answer someone else's phone at least do it properly. Not like a rude power tripping snob.

[Blake Petit]

Originally Posted by Mark Blicharz

Detention is still school. They still have to obey those rules as long as they are on the school's property. Detention is supposed to be punishment, if they are allowed to do what they want on the phone in detention, then where is the punishment? In my high school, suspensions were in school. Kids were getting suspended to get a few day vacation, so the district said no more. The kids that got suspended were charged unexcused absences and were made to sit in the office and study. If they didn't show, they were still charged the unexcused absence and the suspension had a day added on. Nine unexcused absences meant you failed your classes and had to retake the entire semester.

That's very similar to the suspension rules in my school, although kids can still get an out-of-school suspension after enough offenses or for a bad enough offense (like fighting).

[roman]

My point was Detention is after school meaning the parents dont know she is in detention. There for them calling is not out of line. They were checking were thier daughter was.

[Blake Petit]

Originally Posted by roman

Again the teacher should not of answer it and even if the teacher did one the caller id should display who is calling and i don't know if it says Mom or Dad then I would of let them know whats going on. Or asked who is calling. If your going to answer someone else's phone at least do it properly. Not like a rude power tripping snob.

You're supposing that the phone even has caller ID. And even if it did, I'm still waiting for you to excuse Mary Jane.

[Mark Blicharz]

Originally Posted by roman

I don't know my parents like my sister to have one in case of anything and that means anything. Most parents I know want to be able to get in contact with thier children in as many was as possible. Its kinda crazy but parents do like to have ways to check up on their kids. Plus you never know whats going to happen. Life is unpredictable. Again I'm not saying its ok to have them on and in use in school but again I bring it back to the situation in which the teacher was clearly in the wrong.

Life is unpredictable, but May is a flipping superhero. If MJ needs to get in contact with her that badly, then maybe she should drive down or call the office? That's what the phones there are for. If it's a big enough emergency, then the school will excuse the detention and the kid will be free to go. The teacher didn't do anything wrong.

[Mark Blicharz]

Originally Posted by roman

My point was Detention is after school meaning the parents dont know she is in detention. There for them calling is not out of line. They were checking were thier daughter was.

That's what the office phone is for. There's no excuse to have a cell phone in school, ever.