ASK CHIMPION! FEBRUARY 2008

Chimpion · #1 February 11th 2008, 01:33 AM

Welcome back to Ask Chimpion!

It would appear that you lowly humans have finally come to terms with my Simian Superiority, and are at last seeking my guidance in droves. This pleases me greatly!

We have a ton of questions this month, so I will get right into imparting my vast wisdom!

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Chrismozer wonders:

Did Marvel really need to produce Omnibus Editions?
Already have the reprints of early stories via Masterworks. What's the point? How many more times do I need to read FF #1 or Amazing Fantasy #15??

Coming soon: Fantastic Four Silver Age Archive Absolute Masterworks Omnibus Hardcover Edition (soon to be released in paperback). And don't forget....there will be variant editions, too.

Well, the answer is they don't really need to. But they want to. The point is - people keep buying them. It may be mind blowing to think that somewhere out there, there collectors willing to shell out $50-60 for an Omnibus collection, then another for the variant, but there really are people out there with that much passion for collecting. If they didn't sell, Marvel wouldn't make them.

However, as Masterworks go out of print, it is nice that new collections are made. Of course, many people already have those collections, but the one positive things about the Omnibuses is that it keeps those classic stories in print in some form.

If you could have any series collected in TPB or HC, which would it be?

My list includes:
1) Original Hawk and Dove including Showcase #75
2) Original run of OMAC
3) Jack Kirby's Etrigan The Demon
4) Marvel's Terror on the Planet of The Apes that ran thru the black and white mag.
5) Marvel's big 7 issue run of Logan's Run.

Getting tired of reprints early Avengers, FF, etc. etc. Wish the DC and Marvel would do some of the lesser know stuff. Although DC has a better track record with Kamandi, Enemy Ace, etc.

If I am not mistaken, didn't Adventure Comics put out a collected edition of Terror on the Planet of the Apes? Could be wrong about that. Ah - before Mike Ploog was cool, there was that. Your list is interesting, though admittedly - the one series I would love to see collected in a single hardcover volume would have to be Strangers in Paradise. Just waiting for that day...

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Mathew Smith asks:

How did you get so smart? Most apes I see are either sitting/playing around in the jungle or practicing Karate.

I'd explain, but I fear your simple human mind isn't capable of understanding the nuances of my origin story. Though like most chimpanzees, I am quite adept at karate, and practice regularly.

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Terry Verticchio pants:

Okay what do you think Andy looks like in real life?

Tall...short...colour hair...type of weaponry she carries...? That kind of thing.

Ummm... I do KNOW what Andy looks like in real life, and so should you. She is your boss. Or has it been so long since you have been in the office that you forgot? Are you not getting your work done, Terry?

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Virtuadept inquires:

A few questions for the Chimp-meister:

What's your favorite ongoing comic right now?

Shadowpact.

Who's your favorite creator and what are they currently working on?

John Broome. Unfortunately nothing, since he passed away in 1999.

Did you read Brand New Day?

Yes.

What did you think of it, on its own merit?

It is tough to judge it on its own merits, considering what preceded it. However - it wasn't bad. In fact, it was an improvement over the last half of Straczynski's run. However - I don't think it is "fixed." Spider-Man still has a long way to go before it becomes excellent once again.

When do you think we'll see another Marvel/DC crossover? Ever?

There will be one - just as soon as mega event mania stops being a moneymaker for either of them.

What would a wood chuck do if a wood chuck had super-would-chuck-wood powers?

Chuck wood extremely well.

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WhereisTony pries:

Do you prefer organic, or mechanical?

Whichever gets the job done better, I am afraid.

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Y mad Darogan demands:

1) Who will win the English Premier league this year?

Well, it is either going to be Manchester United or Arsenal. Too soon to tell though.

2) Why are Gillett and Hicks trying to destroy Liverpool FC from within?

They aren't. That is just a little fanaticism at work there. They bought an interest in the club as an effort to make money. Unfortunately, sometimes you get club owners who don't really care about the sport. That is what is at work here. The fact that they are American has made their attitude unforgivable to the fans. Personally, I think they are being too hard on the duo. But, it looks like Dubai might be buying their shares, so the point is moot anyway. Personally, I think the fans are too wrapped up in that drama, and not interested enough in how well the team is actually doing this year - which is the important thing.

3) How does "Lost" end?

With a credit roll, and usually an ad for another program on the network.

4) Which came first the egg or the chicken?

Well, scientifically speaking, there were eggs around long before chickens. But if you mean "Which came first, the chicken, or the chicken egg?" - the answer is the chicken. A Chicken Egg can be defined as an egg that a chicken laid. The first chicken was a mutant offspring of its avian predecessor, and was not hatched in an actual chicken egg.

It is all really simple, really.

5) Who was the original 3rd Summers brother meant to be?
6) Who is the 3rd Kryptonian on earth?

You need to catch up on your comic stack man! You are way behind!

7) Why did JLI get cancelled?

Because Cartoon Network hates you.

8) Which country will be the first to get a man on Mars?

Tough to say - the United States has the best chance, thanks to their resources, combined with their working relationship with Japan, who excels technologically. However, the real key will be to see which country first solves the problem of the radiation exposure the astronauts will encounter once they leave the Earth's magnetosphere.

It probably won't be one single nation though. Most major extra-terrestrial missions are conducted jointly these days. I doubt we will see another serious space race, especially when you can get other nations involved, reduce your costs, and still take the credit.

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Gabriel Diaz pines:

Do you know what happened to Adam Johnsey? I miss him.

Where is Adam Johnsey?
More importantly, what is he up to now?

He left comiXtreme some time ago (after a fun period of politics), and really hasn't been seen since. He seems to be pretty active in Star Wars fan circles these days.

Also, you ever thought about staring in your own comic written and illustrated by yourself?

Yes, but I decided against it. Such a comic would be so unbelievably awesome that it would destroy the comic industry as we know it. I couldn't be responsible for something like that.

Were you the creature running around in Cloverfield?

Did that look like a Chimpanzee to you?

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Ryan Broussard is curious:

if you could just read one comic book monthly, what would it be

Honestly, I'd settle for a Sky-Ape monthly comic...

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Andrea Speed wonders:

Does being a superheroine mean you have to have big breasts? Do they come with superheroism, or can only big breasted women be superheroes (or villains)?

It may seem like it, but no, it doesn't. Spider-Girl is a classic example of a reasonably breasted superheroine. Hawkgirl, drawn properly, is another. But you know as much as I do that it has little to do with the breasts - most comic characters are drawn to be sexual specimins. Why are there so few lean-yet-muscular heroes? Batman for crying out loud is drawn like a tank!

So it isn't just the women, but the gi-normous breasts are easier to spot.

First Rex Libris, now The Exterminators - why oh why do all the comics I like get cancelled?

Because the masses don't have the intelligence to follow a well-written comic for long. Ergo, sales dip, and the book gets cancelled.

Blake Petit queries:

What exactly is your connection to the DHARMA Initiative?

Well, I was the original administrator of The Hydra. But I fear I have already said too much.

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Thanks again for all of your questions. I look forward to answering more next month!

Remember, questions for next month's Ask Chimpion! can be emailed to Chimpion@comixtreme.com or you can send me a Private Message at my comiXtreme account. The Ask Chimpion Thread over in the cX Waiting Room seems to be a popular place to post questions as well, so that will do if you don't like email!

Hope to see you all next month, and please - the more questions the better! Start submitting them today!

**B. Schatz** · #2 February 11th 2008, 02:29 AM

Scientifically speaking, that was an awesome set of question answering.

And seriously, Terry, you really need to show up to the offices. You'll be able to marvel at Andrea's lumberjack stature and Craig's shining, tiny midget head.

It will, however, cost you your pants.

chrismozer · #3 February 11th 2008, 06:19 AM

Kudos to you. I was unaware of the reprints of Terror On The Planet Of The Apes. Adventure reprinted 4(?) issues but the storyline originally ran through more than 4 issues of the Marvel b & white mag. I thought a TPB was released years ago (not my Marvel).