FOUR COLOR COMMENTARIES #38: Dating In A Geekified World

[Richard Davidson, Jr.]

Dating In A Geekified World

It can be a really strange world when you're trying to get a date with even a toe in the world of what is commonly referred to as geek. Many of us males have a hard enough time getting a date and it's even worse for someone that has a personal interest or hobby that doesn't tend to cross over to the masses. Be a cosplayer and it could make it all even worse.

I bring up this point because I'm kind of living that question right now. I've been dating a woman since December of last year and it's been going really well. We have a lot of fun times together and we get along really well too. She is even very understanding of the fact that I do things like read comics... and watch MST3k DVDs a lot... and count shows like Mythbusters and Doctor Who in my favorite list...

Yeah... Understanding is one thing but then there are other moments too that kind of makes it sort of confusing.

A couple weekends back, we decided to go and see IRON MAN. When it comes to summer blockbusters, I always wait a couple weeks to see it since that tends to thin out the massive herds of people that have to see it first. From the way that she was talking before the movie, this was something that she was totally into seeing and it was all good. There was much enjoyment had in the theater and we both really liked the movie as a whole.

The next day which was a Saturday, we wound up going to a local mall and, since there is a multiplex in the same parking lot, she said that we should go and see another movie together. Her choice was FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL which didn't seem like a bad choice at first. I have to admit to the fact that I spent more time looking at my watch then actually laughing so I don't think that this would be movie that I would recommend.

The big hook came out while we were in line buying tickets. Her statement on the situation was that we had gone to see a "guy" movie the night before and now we're going to see a "chick" movie. Totally ignoring the fact that FSM is not what most people would call a "chick" movie, I was kind of left in a confused state since she was the one that came up with the idea of seeing IRON MAN on Friday in the first place and she never mentioned anything about the "guy" part of the equation. It kind of wound up in my brain as equating "guy" with "geek" when she was talking about the two movies. She went to my geeky comic book movie and now I had to go to her girlie movie.

Confusing moments like this tend to come up every once in awhile when you have couple that has what could be called differing interests. No one will ever have the exactly same interests and hobbies as you do so it's not like it will wind up being paid back in time when you find that special person. All relationships are a blend of both people and you always wind up with a couple parts not quite gelling together the way that you think it should.

You could say that I lucked out since the movie that she's been waiting to see this summer is SEX AND THE CITY but it wasn't out but it's still kind of left me wondering about how the geek inclination works within a relationship with someone that really doesn't carry the same feelings. In the ghetto of interests and hobbies, the ones that are labeled as "geek" tend to be in the darker area of the list. The gray areas at least give you a little more room to move around but it seems like many of us are left to figure out just how much of a geek we can be in a relationship.

Sidebar Of The Week Part I
Who at DC Comics decided to release the first issue of Final Crisis on the Memorial Day weekend? Hmmm... Let's put the first issue of our big huge crossover mini series of the year out on the week that is guarenteed to have the books delayed by a day? That is some seriously goofy planning in my book.

Sidebar Of The Week Part II
Kristen Bell is a huge hockey fan and a massive Detroit Red Wings fan. She said in a recent interview that, should the Red Wings win the Stanley Cup, she would love to eat fruity pebbles out of the bowl on top. Also, she mentioned something about using that bowl to have herself a sponge bath. I'll wait for a moment while all of you readers take a mental break... just be sure to drool too much on your keyboard...

My Pull List - May 21, 2008
Birds Of Prey #118
Brave And The Bold #13
Justice League of America #21
Justice Society of America #15
X-Factor #31
Terry Moore's Echo #3

[khazra reborn]

i'll be honest on this subject, and it may well offend some of you in some way... only a few friends i have know i read comics, its something i kep very sepeate from the rest of my life.

so it's not really an issue with me in terms of dating, the issue is the datign itself

[Justin Byrd]

My last three girlfriends actually dug the fact that I'm a geek, in fact it was one of the things they really enjoyed about my personality. They also had favorite characters themselves, albeit they didn't follow them that closely.

I think women who are like that understand there's a BIG difference between being a comic nerd and just being an awkward nerd.

PS - I'm not as into hockey as some people...but thanks for the Kristen Bell image.

[Ben Lehnsherr]

Yeah, being a geek isn't nearly the "problem" it used to be with dating and social situations. Geek culture has been become more social acceptable year after year, nearly hand in hand with advancments in consumer available technology.....Tons of comic book movies and the juggernaut that is the video game industry hasn't hurt, either.

A big draw in my last few girlfriends and my ex-wife have actually been my nerdy nature. I was known as the "hot nerd" in high school, and did very well by it. Its never really been a problem for me. I have a massive comic display rack, a ton of graphic novels, posters, and action figures in my computer room and most visitors (my house tend to be small party central on the weekend) thinks its really cool, and nice that I'm so open about my comic love.

[Blob_Liefeld]

I'm 37 years old, weigh 500 pounds, and have never had a girlfriend.

When I stop and think of it, it's kind of amazing I've never seriously considered suicide. My superpower is denial.

[Blob_Liefeld]

Can I kill a conversation, or what?

[ErinPatricia]

The key is finding a girl who likes superhero and action and horror movies more than chick flicks

There is nothing wring with being a geek, or a nerd, or whatever. It's the person that makes you fall in love, not their hobbies or collections or stuff like that.

As for kristen bell...peh, she obviously has no taste in teams.

[Blake Petit]

Originally Posted by ErinPatricia

The key is finding a girl who likes superhero and action and horror movies more than chick flicks

There is nothing wring with being a geek, or a nerd, or whatever. It's the person that makes you fall in love, not their hobbies or collections or stuff like that.

Eat yer hearts out, fellow geeks.

[Ben Lehnsherr]

Originally Posted by Blake Petit

Eat yer hearts out, fellow geeks.

That's a keeper, Mr. Petit. Don't screw this one up.

[Justin Byrd]

Originally Posted by Ben Lehnsherr

Yeah, being a geek isn't nearly the "problem" it used to be with dating and social situations. Geek culture has been become more social acceptable year after year, nearly hand in hand with advancments in consumer available technology.....Tons of comic book movies and the juggernaut that is the video game industry hasn't hurt, either.

A big draw in my last few girlfriends and my ex-wife have actually been my nerdy nature. I was known as the "hot nerd" in high school, and did very well by it. Its never really been a problem for me. I have a massive comic display rack, a ton of graphic novels, posters, and action figures in my computer room and most visitors (my house tend to be small party central on the weekend) thinks its really cool, and nice that I'm so open about my comic love.

Yeah, I recently showed a girl my Heroclix (upon her request).

First time I had a girlfriend over to see my apartment, she saw the picture of Optimus Prime painted on my wall with the Superman logo over my bed and she said "awesome". Needless to say, best relationship I've had yet

The thing is, the girl doesn't have to be a "geek" herself, but if they accept it as not being a bad stigma, and actually find it endearing, that's where you got a good one.

And yeah, Ben, I'm like the "hot" geek in my circle of friends.

[loganski]

There are plenty of girls who are as "geeky" as the guys, but ironically I'm not so attracted to them romantically.
The women I like wouldn't get comic books or adventure films. More than once I've gotten the whole "you're like my kid brother" vibe from girls I'm interested in. I've found it's easier to remain hush hush about that outside the collector community

and I found "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" to be hilarious; it's a "chick flick"for guys.....you'll have to drug me to get me to see "Sex and the City" though